Confessions of an Online Junkie

December 23, 9:38am. I posted on facebook that I would be turning off my computer until after the holiday.

December 23, 10:06am. My keyboard isn't working. My Wacom isn't responding. My computer won't wake up. Call IT, call 911.... oh yeah, I turned it off.

December 23, 10:37am. I have to know what they are saying on facebook. What if they are writing bad things about me under my post. What if Lindsay has posted embarrasing photos. Why did I tell them I was going "dark"???? I'm hyperventilating! I need a brown bag to breathe into. Where are the brown bags?

December 23, 10:52am. Tapping on the keyboard still doesn't wake it up. I will learn this lesson about ten more times through the day. I slink away from my desk slightly dejected feeling that somehow my life has lost meaning.

December 23, 2:49pm. I cheat and check my email on my phone. Penis growth samples shipped for free. Who, I ask, wants a sample of something growing on a penis??? Now I'm even more depressed. It seems my lack of online presence hasn't even been noticed!

December 24th, 8:00am. I make my breakfast and, as I almost always do, head to my office to eat it while I return emails. The keyboard still doesn't wake up my Mac. I eat sitting in front of a black screen. I can almost imaging what my Pinterest boards look like... almost.

December 24th, 10:30am. Somehow I get distracted from thinking about online things.

December 25th, 8:00am. Christmas. I love spending time playing games. Why don't I do this more often? Abby, let me show you how to use your sewing machine. Kate, let's paint our nails. Jack, can I have a turn with your remote control car? Ethan, how about another game of Qwirkle.

December 26th, 8:00am. Taking one more day off for the holidays isn't too lazy right?

December 27th, 8:00am. I should really update the blog. I should really get some work done. I sould really play another game of Qwirkle!

December 28th, 9:27am. I have to get back at it. I drag myself down to my desk. I hear the Mac chime as my screen illuminates. I press the browser icon...... internet!

December 28th, 9:46am. I am working on a blog entry. I am chatting with a friend on facebook. I am about to tell said friend how great I think they are and how much I appreciate their friendship when CRASH my screen goes black!!!! I'm not even kidding.

December 28th, 9:47am. Maybe this is a sign. Maybe I can get away with another day of no computer.

December 28th, 11:04am. Nope. I have readers than NEED me... or so I like to believe.

Decmeber 28th, 11:36am. Published.