Oh my Heck!

(Layout by Heidi Sonboul)

Today was one of those mornings, like so many lately, that I wish I knew how to swear. You see, I grew up in a very conservative home. A home where tank tops were scandalous, carbonation made a strong drink, movies were PG and the harshest language spoken was "Nell's Bells."

In fact, I have heard my father swear once. It was the night before my wedding day as he was balancing precariously on a ladder while my mother directed him in the ways of making a chandelier sparkle. I have never heard my mother swear. EVER!

But sometimes, I think swearing could do a person good. Is it really healthy to keep in such frustration? Is self control beneficial, or would letting an appropriately timed, four-letter word slip my lips make me feel better and reduce my level of stress? I don't know, but on days like today, I start thinking about conducting some experiments!

I am simply not convinced that the curse-replacements I have learned are strong enough to alleviate the emotional frustration of some life experiences.

In Utah, it is very common to hear the following:
Oh my Heck
Dang it
Gosh darn it
Oh my goodness
Freak
Shoot

In our house, we are much more clever except for Eric who likes one particular four-letter word for every swearing occassion! His word of choice starts with SH and rhymes with fit. He says limiting himself to just that word is self-control.

Some of the phrases we have used include:
Holy Cat's Pajamas
Swearword, swearword, swearword
Shitake Mushrooms
Clean up this SHhhhtuff
The whole Famdamily
Snap
Oh my... followed by silence when my self control kicks in
What the... followed by silence when my self control kicks in

So tell me, do you swear? If you do, does it help or hurt? If you don't, what do you say instead? How do swear words become swear words anyway?!?!?

What the freak does this blog post have to do with Cosmo Cricket anyway, gosh darnit?!